The Oscar Pretorius trial has highlighted for me that so many South Africans seek revenge, retribution and punishment. There is general lack of empathy due to a total ignorance of basic psychology, human action, human reaction and what gives rise to human behavior. The Nation gathered their collective dark sides and projected that onto Oscar. He became the Scapegoat for those who keep their dark sides nicely hidden from the public eye. Public polls on radio and TV stations call for the ultimate sentence: ” Bring back the death penalty”. ” Lock him up and throw the key away” is one of the many self-righteous pleas for harsh punishment. They substitute bullets with words and thoughts…….and think they are not committing murder.
During this whole trial, there was lone voice that spoke to the core – Dr Dorianne Weil, better known as Dr Dee. Such a pity she got so little airtime. And the core for me is : we cannot make this just about THE EVENT; we need to learn from this and address the source of violent, aggressive behavior.
Read this article by Gabor Mate on rage against women.
It is high time that parents are educated about the developmental needs of their children, that they incorporate healthy attachment parenting styles in order to raise well balanced, emotionally intelligent adults.